I can no longer stay silent.
I can't sit in my office this morning and do my normal things. I cannot clear the foggy feeling of tears out of my eyes. I can't take away pain, or anger, or frustration, or suffering. But one thing I can do is tell you that you are not alone.
There are days when getting out of bed is hard. I've been there. I have smiled through social events that I just didn't feel like I could be at. I'm not through those woods yet; I'm still walking in them every day. I know how your heart can hurt. So many of us play strong because it's what is "expected of us" by so many people. We cover our sadness with busy schedules, or waste our day trying to find a bit of laughter on Netflix. Our society tells us that it's only okay to be strong. It's okay to be strong.
It's also okay to be falling apart.
If you never hear it from anyone, please hear this now: you are loved. You are so loved, more than you can possibly imagine. You are loved more than I could ever put into words. And the people that love you don't want you to be strong. They want to take you as you are. They want you broken, and messy, and suffering. It's hard to hear and it is even harder to understand, but it's true. You are loved.
My brother-in-law posted this on Facebook yesterday, and I wanted to share it with you:
"Aren't all these notes the senseless writings of a man who won't accept
the fact that there is nothing we can do with suffering except to
suffer it?”
― C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed
My notes are senseless writings, and we are suffering. I am suffering with you.
I can no longer stay silent. We are all broken, we are all hurting. We aren't weak. We are human.
It's okay,
It's fine to be not fine,
You are loved.
I promise.
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