The Rantings of Preggers: "My Husband is Competent" Edition.

Recently we got a kitten. His name is Harley, and he's become a well-loved member of our family. He's a snuggle bug. I really don't know if it's Jim, Packer, or me who loves him most.

Seriously, look at that that. Snuggle buddies for life.

And no, I'm not writing an entire blog about a kitten. When people find out that Jim and I have this new kitten, their first response is usually, "How can you have a kitten? You can't scoop the litter when you're pregnant." This might seem like a normal question. In fact, it's a valid question. When you are pregnant they encourage you not to scoop litter to avoid any issues with toxoplasmosis.

So why does that silly question bother me so much? It irritates me because when people give unsolicited comments about pregnancy they all seem to center around one common theme: people must forget that I am married. Either that, or they believe that Jim is incapable of helping out around the house.

It's true that I don't scoop our cat litter; Jim scoops it. We believe in a division of labor. I absolutely understand that there are many women who do all the housework while their husbands work. It's great! However, we are not that family. Jim and I both do work around the house, and to be completely honest he does more work now that I'm pregnant. I am incredibly thankful for that.

Women do most of the work when it comes to pregnancy; that's no secret. It's a nine-month process of making another human! Maybe this is why people forget that husbands and new dads are just as responsible for the little tyke as the mother is. I have no scientific proof of this. It is merely speculation.

I think these comments are more frustrating when they come from the mouths of medical professionals. I was given a look of absolute horror when I told my nurse practitioner that I was going to pump and bottle-feed our baby. "Oh no," she said, "then you won't get the bonding experience with baby." Why can't Jim get the bonding experience with baby? Why should it just be me? I know so many dads that love the feeding time with their little ones. It can be a quiet bonding time for them as well.

I wish that people would stop forgetting about these Dads and Dads-to-be. Frankly, I find it not only insulting to them, but to their wife. It feels like a slightly nicer way of saying, "oh, you are married to an incompetent male." Ish! I'm in no way trying to berate single-parent households. Everything works differently for everyone! Since I have a job, I'm simply not home every day to accomplish everything by myself. In our lives, we have the ability to co-parent, and I'm extremely proud of the fact that I'm married to someone who's willing to share the labor.

No, I don't scoop my kitty litter. Yes, I asked Jim what he was thinking for nursery colors. Yes, Jim helped me work on our baby registry. Maybe I inherited this attitude from my parents. They were both equally involved in raising Kate and I, as well as doing things around the house. This topic probably irritates me more than it should due to the crazy hormones. Who knows, am I right?

I'm so honored and excited that Jim is eager to be a dad, and do all of the things that come along with that. I just hope that everyone else can get excited about that too! He's ready to do the caring, and he's got our boys to back-up on the protecting. I mean, come on, how could you not put your faith in these faces?