CrossFit: A Lesson in Blind Faith.

When I won six CrossFit sessions at our silent auction, I was pumped. I'd heard about it and seen the CrossFit games. I knew it wouldn't be easy. However, there was a slight underestimation of what would be going on. Keep in mind: I'd just started running. Since I'm a little sibling, this small feat in my exercise routine gave me quite a big head. My eight minute jogging had turned me into Samantha, Queen of Fitness. I could essentially climb a mountain.

After my first two Crossfit sessions on Thursday and Friday, I was shaken. It only took two days to turn my faith in myself upside down. What I had been so sure I could handle I was now seeing as an insurmountable challenge. Yesterday was my third session. As I began going through the new torture Crisa had written down on the Dry Erase Board of Doom (DEBD), I actually turned and asked, "What happens if your body gives out before you make it through 5 times?" I'm completely new to this intense of a workout. I actually had no idea if I could physically complete the task at hand. Crisa very simply replied, "You won't. It's not over when you're tired, it's over when you're done."

I believed her! Even though my legs were shaking and I was sweating only slightly less than the time I had food poisoning, I believed her. She knew what she was doing. Even though I didn't believe in myself, I believed in her faith in me. She was never negative; she was honest. Her confidence in me was reassuring.

Faith is something that can be difficult to wrap ourselves around. Faith in anything. Faith in our family, faith in religion, faith in friends, and faith in ourselves. Blind faith is even harder. It makes us feel a little helpless to do something completely new when it hurts or tires us. It's hard to trust when you're feeling weak, physically or mentally. When we fail, our faith can fail. It can be shaken.

So what's the difference? If all faith can be shaken, why is it so much more difficult to give into blind faith? Blind faith means that you don't fully understand what is happening. I didn't fully understand working out, and I still don't. My whole body was screaming at me. Trusting that Crisa knows what I can and can't get through isn't easy...but it's what I have to do. As humans we are so against this principle. We want proof. We crave that immediate, tangible evidence as to why we should believe in something. Sometimes we don't get that proof right away. There are days we must get a little battered and bruised before we realize the blessings that can come from our journey.

The phrase "seeing is believing" can be true, and most often it is. It takes patience to wait for results. We can spend our waiting periods doubting and fighting, or we could do something more courageous. We can trust. We can allow ourselves that blind faith, no matter how infinitesimal. It's easy to cliff dive when you've watched four other people do it, you've tested the depth of the water, and scanned the area for dangerous rocks. But to be the first one to jump? Everyone's done it before, but not today. You didn't get to see it happen. You have to look at them and trust, blindly, that you'll make it. That is what takes the real guts.

I didn't go into CrossFit thinking I would have some crazy revelation about the importance of blind faith, but here it is. I still have no idea what I'm doing there (or why I'm enjoying) every session. I guess I'll just have to put a little more blind faith into my trainer. Oh, and buy a CrossFit tank top so I can show off how great my arms are going to look.